Bridle Your Tongue

It has been amazing to me all of the life lessons that we learn come from scripture. I did not grow up in a religious household, a God loving home, but not religious. For me to read the Bible now as an adult, I am astounded by the life truths that it contains.

A few days ago in my nightly reading I read James 3.

This specific chapter is about bridling your tongue. It says: "If any man offend not in word, the same is a perfect man, and able also to bridle the whole body." (James 3:2)

Today I caught myself amidst a gossip fest at work. I was surprised that once I joined in the conversation that I was carried away by its current. Realizing my error I began to paddle back as hard as I could but the words were like crashing rapids taking me further and further down stream. The power that words can have!

Elder Kendrick in his talk Christlike Communications, says "The real challenge that we face in our communications with others is to condition our hearts to have Christlike feelings for all of Heavenly Father’s children. When we develop this concern for the condition of others, we then will communicate with them as the Savior would."

I know that I lose my temper and words come out "wrong" or my tone is unbridled to say the least. These are moments when I get swept away. Later when I think of who I was talking to, or rather remember the worth of the person I was talking too, I become ashamed.

One of the most wonderful woman I have ever met, recently moved out of our ward. And the reason why I consider her so wonderful was that she was incredibly bridled with her words. When she spoke it was because she had something to say that should be said. She was always glowing and so full of peace. The words were not fighting to get out, she was not interrupting others or interjecting in the conversation for some sort of acceptance or camaraderie. She had bridled her words. And I greatly admired her for it.

One day I ran into her at Wal-Mart on a particularly bad day for me. I had been crying all day and was desperately trying to get in and out of the store as quickly as possible. When I ran into her she said hello and asked me how I was. I began to say empty words of "doing great" and "keeping busy". She just looked into my eyes and tears began to fill her eyes. No words were needed. I let go and cried and she just stood there in the middle of the cereal isle with me silent tears rolling down her own cheeks. She gave me a hug and we went our separate ways. What power that her love has that no words were needed. This is something I aspire to be.

Elder Kendrick mentions 4 un-Christlike types of communication: Lying, Blaming, Criticising, and Anger. I am glad he points this out as now I can mentally put these in the "No" pile. While in my heart I have always known these to be infectious evil actions, I have the solid direction now that they definitely are.

He says that "Christlike communications are expressed in tones of love rather than loudness. They are intended to be helpful rather than hurtful. They tend to bind us together rather than to drive us apart. They tend to build rather than to belittle." These are such wonderful words of direction that I hope I can apply and employ in my life.